seven signs of ageing


Written: 2004
Released: 2005 on 'Mr Jeays'

Notes Inspired originally by my hatred of advertising
- 'combat the seven signs of ageing with new moisturising
crap from whoever' - but then, with the start of the second Iraq
war, it sort of became something else, and the two merged into
this song.



There's seven signs of ageing five signs of problem hair
Stain-free deodorants and perfume scented air
As you crawl out of the rubble there's no need to despair
We've got it over here and soon you'll have it over there
You'll have seven signs of ageing five signs of problem hair
Stain-free deodorants and perfume scented air
And brand new bedroom units full of clothes you never wear
Till you're so drugged up on having you'll forget they're even there

Where you can make mistakes then sue someone else for free
A blame and cash in culture no win and there's no fee
While your country's bombing children to set their country free
Well someone has to suffer just as long as it's not me
And you'll get free toys from Disney if you feed your children shit
They can stuff their sorry faces until they've got the set
They can drink Coca Cola till they're as free as they can get
Till they're lazy and they're fat and they're no longer any threat
Then you can watch Madonna advertising Gap
While children sweat in sweatshops to bring you brandname crap
A brandname badge of honour to put you on the map
Just take my hand I'll take you there there'll be no turning back
And you'll get interest free credit with nought to pay till May
And more and more enticements to overspend your pay
Until you can't afford it and they take it all away
And you're drowning in your debt a little deeper every day

Then we'll give you religion to wash away your sin
Just open up your spirit and let the light flood in
It's easy and it's quick it does what it says on the tin
Just close your eyes then close your mind and put your faith in him
And you'll get life everlasting 'neath striped and starry skies
And the Cross of St George will rise up before your eyes
And this land of hope and glory will feed you bullshit spin and lies
Until one day you find your freedom fucked with freedom fries

And you'll have seven signs of ageing no-one ever saw
Five signs of problem hair you never had before
Till karaoke pop stars leave you screaming out for more
And you line up meek and mild as they lead you off to war
To save your seven signs of ageing five signs of problem hair
Stain-free deodorants and perfume scented air
And brand new bedroom units full of clothes you never wear
Till you're so drugged up on having you'll forget they're even there

And you'll sleep a little deeper each and every day
Till the starving and the homeless all just fade away
And you won't remember life could be any other way
And no-one ever listens to a single word you say
© Philip Jeays 2004
Philip Jeays © Sean K

Released April 18th 2016 Take The Slow Train album

© Philip Jeays 2011-2016